Self amusement.

This poor little chap had fallen in my recycle bucket and I extracted the price of a photo shoot for his release.

Ah the guillotine, those were the days! This pici just makes me chuckle....

As does this one.....note to self, must buy larger swim goggles.

"Mr.Cammarota, the Doctor will see you now".

Hit and miss.

Miss: In the hopes of getting some good bird photo’s I purchased a bird feeder and hung it on my back deck. This prop of choice has the birds in a frenzy when I’m not in the vicinity, but as soon as I’m sitting in the wings (no pun intended) those buggers are off. Not to be daunted I tried again with a nice ornate bird bath, surly this would work? But no, those ungrateful little bastards don’t even use it, so now it has become a water feature that I drop flowers and petals in to!

Hit: There are a lot of ugly helmets out there in the windsurfing world, but not this one. Gramps clearly didn’t want his street cred of style and sophistication to be diminished on the water. A classic winning silver accessory will catch the ladies eye every time.

Miss: “Best photo of a hot guy”....that’s the little monthly contest we have at work. The esteemed prize is the respect of ones co-workers for your good taste and balls to take the shot!

Easy yes.....NO! Agggghhhh-here’s the thing, I know a LOT of hot guys but I’m too embarrassed to either sneak a photo of them or blatantly ask out right if they’d say ‘cheese’. So far this month this is my entry, hot guy-poor shot. The best part is the bloke in the background with his bottom lip out, that about sums up how I feel about being such a wimp in my own contest!

Hit: Who wouldn’t want to rest their paws here, even if it is on naff plastic chairs.

Five things I witnessed at the gym today - plus one...

1. Lots of small dark skinned men in the Hawaiian uniform of all male work out dudes….sneakers, tattooed legs, board shorts, neon yellow Maui cement t-shirt & pod.

2. Courageously over weight people taking the steps to shed some pounds….but why of why do they wear spandex?

3. Lots of male body language, the secret hand shake & one shoulder arm clamp hug are two of my faves.

4. Older man (miuns underwear) wearing flimsy waaaaaaaaaay too short shorts.

5. Me – the only freckled haole in there (proper) laughing out loud listening to the #1 podcast in the UK “Russell Brand on BBC Radio 2”.

Yes, yes, I know, I know, I'm shallow and judgemental, but people - it's a 24 hour feak show out there………

And on another completely random other note, hands up all those who have laughed outloud inappropriately . Fantastic.

The weekend.

I get the calling about twice a year to head east to Hana and immerse in nature. On the way this weekend I was reminded of the lyrics to a song “where I live, there are rainbows”, as we paused to appreciate this copse of rainbow eucalyptus that are really something special.

While GP surfed I took off on my bike to Keanae. In an innovative attempt to make a funny little movie I mounted the GoPro on my handle bars, but it was just too wobbly to produce a satisfying….well.... anything. The ride however, was completely gratifying and it felt so good to ride up and down the hills smelling and observing the little things in life. Post spin I went for a wee in the bushes and saw this pretty web, as the spider was missing I deduced (in an unusual roll reversal) I had probably scared it death!

The Hana Cabana where we stay is a slice of heaven, its tranquil, small & simply lovely (not unlike it’s occupants this weekend)! If I ever come back as a plant, I want to take root in Hana.

And finally a not so happy ending. I went to snorkel in the crystal clear water at Hamoa Bay, where (after the disappointment of my bike mount) I figured I’d go back to basics and take the GoPro out for a gentle swim. Bearing the curse of all freckled folk, I slapped on the sunscreen like lard on a channel swimmer. The sandy bottom was speckled with sunlight and as I saw my first shoal of little silver fish I aimed the camera. As I looked through the viewfinder it wasn’t the National Geographic moment that caught my eye, but the rising tide in the ‘waterproof’ case! Aghhhhhh, waterproof camera lesson 101, be sure the housing is properly closed……oh and did I mention that it wasn’t my camera?

As any mature adult would do, I decided to break the news to GP by drawing him a picture of the ill fated object of his desire. I'll sign it of course.......