Sunday, October 21, 2007

Home improvement.

I think the key to successful home ownership is to have a crew of honest, reliable, affordable and (as a bonus), tasty men to assist you. Inevitably house parts that make up the whole wear out or break and while I do a lot, some repair and work should definitely be left for the experts.

There is also the cheap-fast-good factor, meaning you only ever get two out of the three aforementioned options. So if you’re a cheap bastard don’t moan about the bloke who does a good job and takes his time. Conversely if you need the job done immediately (if not sooner) I suggest you pay well to get the task done right, coz if he’s fast and cheap then ladies as we all know….he won’t be good!

I have gathered quite a collection of men and decided I should rate them. I was surprised to see that getting things done quickly by a hunk –a-hunk of burning love is not my priority!
...........................Cheap.......Fast......Good......Tasty
The roofer & tiler........X..........................X..........X
The mr.fix- it.............X..........................X.............
The chef...................X.............X............X...........X
The gardener..............X..........................X...........X
The electrician............X...........................X.............
The mechanic.............X...........................X...........X
The bug man............................X.............X.............
The painter................X.............X...........................
The lover...................X.............X.........................X

Anyway this weekend Mr.fix-it was here and we crossed 11 items off the list of 14 which was progress indeed, my favorite being the new storage for my boards etc. He created a simple rack that is total perfection as the PVC rolls when I take the items in and out, in and out and in and out which I did a lot just to received the pure satisfaction of the system working so well :-)

Bloody hell, it’s a good job the lovers tasty!

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

This brings to mind a film, The Cook, The Thief, His Wife, And Her Lover. As Roger Ebert put it, "you can describe the movie simply in terms of the characters and the lustful and unspeakable things they do to one another." Substitute the tiler, the electrician, and what have you...

Anonymous said...

Lovely blog but have you thought of exchanging the chef for the lover? The chef's the only one who scores in all four categories - high praise indeed.

Mater x
P.S. Where has the wondrous cupboard been built?

cammar said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
cammar said...

Considering that speed isn't that great of a virtue for a lover, I would rather exchange the lover for the roofer... ;-)

But be ready for some rain in the living room!

PS. Deleted comment was me... too many spelling mistakes... Mater would have given me terrible times...

Sharon said...

Hey Anon: Want to come to dinner?!

Mater: You're right, the chef's a keeper. However we're all replaceable so ya never know who's going to fulfil which role!

Cammar: The roofer as the lover and the lover as the roofer, the first part sounds great......

Anonymous said...

What's the roofer got that the lover hasn't GP?

I know curiosity killed the cat but I really am on a "need to know" basis here:-)

Mater x

meesh said...

this is one of my favorite posts. you are kin hilarious shaz. Do em all that's what I say !!!

Anonymous said...

Carpenters do make better studs.

Anonymous said...

A dinner invite?! For me? This brings to mind a limerick:

"There was a young lady from Kent,
Who said that she knew what it meant
When men asked her to dine
Offered her cocktails, and wine,
She knew what it meant, but she went."

Now substitute laddie for lady, he for she, women for men, him for her, and... the goose is cooked.

Sharon said...

Anon: Good job and against my better judgment I’m falling into your trap of guessing your real identity, are you the Kahuna in Keiki clothing?

Anonymous said...

Totally love this one - all I can say (with great pride) that's my girl :-)

Go with Meesh's advice and enjoy......

Mater x