Tuesday, February 07, 2012


When I'm challenged I always turn inward and look at my part in the events that are currently causing me to feel _________ (fill in the blank). At the ripe old age of 51 I'm pretty clued in to my thinking patterns, but there's always more to learn, and the time felt right for a big dose of new understanding. So I took myself impatient self off for nine day retreat in the desert with the hopes of fast forwarding my personal knowledge.

As I moved into my casita, this wise chap sat in mediation by my front door and I looked upon him as a comforting omen that all was as it should be.

It takes courage to walk through new doors and into the unknown. But as the alternative was a snails pace momentum, (lets face it) the choice to fully immerse was easy.

Tuxedo, doing the cat walk.

The days were full on. Our breakfast bell rang at 7:30am and we pushed through daily until 9:00pm with lectures, guided meditations, emotional release, surprises galore and plenty of laughter, tears and homework. There was not much time to enjoy the scenery, but between the big room, the dining hall and my casitas, I got to enjoy the changing light on the distant mountains.

When you're in process you have to have hope. Trust that despite everything you're on the right path and that bigger, brighter more amazing things are coming your way. My time at Kenyon Ranch more than reinforced my belief that life is a rich journey made all the more meaningful by those beautiful souls you connect with along the way.

Case in point, batting practice was extremely satisfying by myself, but it was never more healing, profound, freeing, funny and empowering than with these amazing women. The local Sheriff had to check there was nothing untoward going on as our collective foul mouthed decibel levels reached an all time high! GO GIRLS!

20 strangers arrived at the start of the process and 20 deeply connected friends expressed collective heart ache at having to leave each other at the end. I'm no stranger to personal growth, but I've never experienced more love in one process than at STAR

If you look up the word 'inspiring' or 'compassionate' there should be a picture of Barbara Findeisen! What a woman-what a program-what a gift to bask in the emotional and physical safety that she and her team create for the excavation of your psyche. If the option to slip her a fat check and stay longer had been on the table, I wouldn't have thought twice about it.

Oh.....and in case you're feeling old, Barbara is going to be 84 years young next month and has more mojo than most people half her age (present company excluded)!



Leedslass said...

So glad it was all, and more, than you'd hoped for. Not perhaps my cup of tea but then I'm a Brit through and through and we tend not to look at ourselves too closely. We leave that to the Americans!!!!!:-)

rebecca said...

tuxedo has it goin' on! thanks for sharing and for always inspiring. hugs - r