As one does, I went to the loo at Heathrow and came across the most convenient dispenser any jet setting girl would ever need; namely; tampons, pain killers, mints and Durex! Brilliantly convenient (I thought) if you'd run out of toothpaste, are on your period, have cramps but fancy a shag with the tasty bloke sitting opposite you on the next flight! Genius in a vending machine.
Plus there was great solice at the Newsagents as ALL the chocolate was Cadburys and the man sitting behind the counter was wearing a turban which,(forgive me) amused me no end and oddly let me know I was home. Alas I didn’t have the balls to take his photo!
Anyway, once to my Mum's I slept like the dead as I was so happy to be horizontal and finally out of seats 33A, 35F and 16A respectively. Here I am this morning in my own glorious yawning version of 'The Scream'!
To fully climb back in my body I went for a swim, steam and sauna at the local health club. There were three blokes in the sauna and one of them had such a big chest I wondered if he’d had implants... but I digress. One bloke was yabbering away to his mate who clearly couldn't give a toss about the topic until it changed.
Bloke one: “so that Mel, she’s ready for ya”
Bloke two: “really why do ya say that”
Bloke one: “well she’s alright her…..she’s single, has a job and even owns her own pad in Roundhay. Easy peasy lemon squeasy that one”
I thought “Christ-how easy is it to pick up men from Leeds”?! You just tell them you've got a job, are unattached, own a pad (did I mention my Mum's flat is in Roundhay)and easy peasy lemon squeasy and you're in! In a wise move on the managements part at the David Lloyd Heath Center they decided not to install the genius vending machine in the locker room! Spoil sports.
Bloke one: “so that Mel, she’s ready for ya”
Bloke two: “really why do ya say that”
Bloke one: “well she’s alright her…..she’s single, has a job and even owns her own pad in Roundhay. Easy peasy lemon squeasy that one”
I thought “Christ-how easy is it to pick up men from Leeds”?! You just tell them you've got a job, are unattached, own a pad (did I mention my Mum's flat is in Roundhay)and easy peasy lemon squeasy and you're in! In a wise move on the managements part at the David Lloyd Heath Center they decided not to install the genius vending machine in the locker room! Spoil sports.
6 comments:
I think you might be onto something with those vending machines Sharon, could be a market in Leeds. Not sure about Leeds fellas though, I have heard they are all lemons - might need to buy a dozen
I'll let you know if they provide the same 'services' in the pub WC's! As for Leeds blokes if the ones in the sauna are anything to go by you might be right.
I could hear the British accent in this post...
Talking about technology innovation (the vending machine), I just watched an live football match on SKY with dad and you could bet on the final score at anytime using the remote control...
I'm surprised they don't have it in the US!
Anyway, Inter-Man U coming up in february... I'm ready to bet with you.
United vs Inter eh? I will put a wager on that one... I thought you were a Napoli man? GP on the bandwagon noooo!?
Ah ha-it's the Ibrahimovic/Rohanldo show down we've been looking for, excellent.
it sounds like you jumped right back into the swing of things. Cammar is right, I could hear the accent when I read the post. Have you managed to recall which side of the road to drive on? Hopefully no dented fenders, or boots, or chipped windscreens. I have missed your posts. My best to Mater.
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